The Mystery of Sabrina Bouvier
by YellowRoseOfTexas
Summary: A parody of Sabrina Bouvier. If you don't know what I'm talking about, read #15 & #60. And then have a good laugh because I am really, really proud of this story! R&R!


_The Mystery of Sabrina Bouvier_  
  
Disclaimer: No character is under my ownership.  
  
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"There!" Sabrina Bouvier smiled back at her reflection in the mirror. "Perfect!" 

Leaning over her vanity to pick up her perfume bottle, Sabrina planted a quick kiss on the picture of her gorgeous, sophomore boyfriend. "I love you, Carlos!" 

Sabrina was so lucky to be dating a tenth-grade guy. All of her friends thought so. And Sabrina couldn't imagine dating one of the immature boys in the eighth grade. The thought of being stuck at one of the lifeless, hopeless dances at SMS bored her to death. Now that the world of high school had been revealed to her, Sabrina liked to keep a high profile. 

She'd rather be anywhere with Carlos. Carlos was too incredible for words. He didn't look like he was just sixteen years old. More like twenty. His tall, athletic build made Sabrina feel like a little pixie when they were together. And she loved running her hands through his thick, black hair and gazing into his dark eyes on a romantic, moonlit evening. 

Tonight would be a night like that. 

_Ding-dong_

"That's him!" Sabrina cried. She slipped on her pink, platform shoes, squirted herself with the heavenly scent of an expensive fragrance, and grabbed her white sequinned handbag. Taking one last glimpse in the mirror, she smoothed out her perfectly-curled blonde locks and breathed a sigh of relief. 

"Oh. It's perfect." 

Then she took her time heading down the grand staircase and answering her front door. 

But much to her dismay, awaiting her arrival at the front door was not Carlos Mendez, the stunningly-handsome young man who adored her. Instead, she was staring back a girl who looked slightly familiar, but no names came to mind. Nor could Sabrina decipher why on earth this girl was at her door. 

"Hi, I'm Dawn Schafer. Sabrina's baby-sitter." 

"...Excuse me?" Sabrina cocked an eyebrow. 

"I'm here to baby-sit for Sabrina Bouvier," Dawn repeated. "Her mother called the Baby-sitters Club, saying that she needed a sitter for her daughter this evening." 

"What?" Sabrina screeched. "Look, is this some kind of joke? Because Carlos is going to be here any minute, and I really don't have time to play games." She looked down at the gaudy, _home-made_ looking box in Dawn's right hand. "What on earth is that?" 

"It's a Kid-Kit," Dawn answered cheerfully "Where's Sabrina?" 

"You're looking at her," Sabrina answered coldly. In return, she got a blank stare from Dawn. 

"You can't be Sabrina Bouvier," said Dawn. "Sabrina Bouvier is the little girl who won the Little Miss Stoneybrook Pageant this year. She was in a bunch of newspaper articles, and the town gave her a parade. " 

Sabrina gave her Dawn an even stranger look. "Um, I won that pageant when I was seven. I still have my tiara sitting on my dresser. Say, don't I know you from school or something?" 

Dawn studied this girl who was claiming to be Sabrina Bouvier. "Yeah, I've seen you around. But you can't be the same Sabrina Bouvier who won the Little Miss Stoneybrook pageant because that would mean something must be terribly wrong, and if you are in fact who you claim to be..." 

Sabrina had stopped paying attention and was looking at her watch. Carlos was running late, it seemed, but she knew he would be arriving any second with a good reason for being tardy. And this Dawn girl obviously needed to be gone when he showed up. 

"Okay!" Sabrina flashed a fake grin. "Well, it's been nice chatting, but you obviously have the wrong Sabrina Bouvier so I suppose you'd better leave and get everything straightened out!" 

"But I--" Dawn was cut off by Sabrina quickly shutting the door in her face. 

_Hm, let's see... _Dawn sat down on the curb to think things over. _Sabrina Bouvier won the pageant when she was seven? If she's thirteen now, that means the pageant happened six years ago. So if I was thirteen when the pageant happened... and that was six years ago... and I'm thirteen now..._

Dawn sighed. She knew that Stacey could calculate the answer to this equation much faster and without even using a calculator. Stacey often said she could read numbers like she could read words. Stacey would know the answer. 

_Afterall,_ Dawn thought. _She's aced eighth grade Algebra six times already._   
  
  


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**THE END**   
  
A/N: Reviews, please! 


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